The Reader For Leaders Seminars, articles, and musings by Paul D. Casey

“Appreciation is a wonderful thing: it makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well.” –Voltaire

The first part of showing appreciation to others is to have your alert eyes on, looking to praise around every corner, more of a mindset. From there, it’s delivering the encouraging words by recognizing the specific trait in that person that makes him/her excellent in that moment in time. Then enjoying the bounce-back reflection of joy as it is received from the recipient.

“I’m sorry for the person I became. I’m sorry that it took so long for me to change. I’m ready to make sure I never become that way again cause who I am hates who I’ve been…and who I am will take the second chance you gave me.” –Who I am Hates who I’ve Been (Reliant K)

I’ve felt this before in a relationship. When I realize I started back at point A, and now wake up one day at point Z. And I don’t like the regression. And I don’t get rattled enough along the way to make a change until some major thing happens to wake me up. Then I take the steps necessary to get back on track and vow to not get that way again. And I hope that the receiver gives a second chance–sometimes they do, sometimes they don’t.  Same process for my walk with God: an easy drift away, He gets my attention, I repent and return to my first Love and receive His forgiveness gratefully as He again gives me another chance.

“The men I admire and enjoy the most are those who pause to wonder and remind me to…Stop. Look. Listen….To wonder is to open ourselves up to the gift of being with a sense of gratitude.” –Sam Keene

How many people do you know that are introspective, that actually take time to ponder how they relate to the Creation God put them around, that get away for solitude just to mull things over with God, to listen to His Spirit’s voice within them, then just to appreciate what He does not reveal, and gush thankfulness back to Him for the many blessings He’s poured out?  When I have done this, it has truly “opened me up” at the spirit-level.  When I don’t, I feel like I’m drowning in the noise of this life, caught in its current of negativity, too busy to appreciate, wonder, or listen.

“I do not try to dance better than anyone else. I only try to dance better than myself.” –Mikhail Baryshnikov

At the Pinewood Derby this past weekend, the cub scouts were told that the best times would win the trophy, not necessarily the winners of the individual races. But it was obvious they weren’t getting that message, while watching the races against each other. While they couldn’t do anything about their speed by that point, we have the opportunity to better ourselves with personal development, increased passion, or deeper commitment, with only the mirror as our competitor, and only one Person in the Audience: Jesus Christ. Let’s all take our focus off our comparisons with others, and keep pushing for greatness with an upward and inward look.

In the book Fire in the Belly, that I’ve quoted a lot in this blog, a dedication was listed for a man who had passed away. As I underlined phrases in it, I thought of how neat those words would be if said of me at the end of my life, too.  What do you think?

“A growing ability to deepen the covenants of friendship” I’m trying to do that more than ever more in my life.

“To admire simplicity” Scaling back is a constant prodding I need to give myself, for I can make life more complicated (is that a spiritual gift? HA)

“To accept limitations and disappointments without resentment” If I have the right perspective, God’s perspective, then life is simply easier emotionally.

“to forgive the unacceptable” This is hard, frankly, but it’s what Jesus, my Model, did.

“To love without grasping” What a concept that I’d always linked together, but must be separate. Holding what I love loosely; I’m not the owner, just the steward.

“To be grateful for the gift of life” It colors everything when looked at with a grateful lens.

“Am I the only one who’s traded in the altar for a stage? The performance is convincing and we know every line by heart. Only when no one is watching can we really fall apart.” –Stained Glass Masquerade (Casting Crowns)

I remember growing up when tennis star Andre Agassi promoted the line “Image is Everything” for the camera he was advertising. He was flashy, outside the box, and animated.  Since we are about the same age, I often wondered what he was like on the  inside. I think many of us have that view of others around us in church: what are they like when they aren’t “performing” or looking good in the big group?  And then we look inward and say, I wonder how much they know of the real me.  It’s tough to keep up a false front, and so relieving to be able to be transparent with safe people, who then can be used of God to help us grow to be more of who we were created to be. Sometimes “falling apart” with safe people is the first step to being authentic, which then can lead to rebuilding.